Tonight I Turned left....

At the end of the street from our school is a "stop" sign, turn right,get onto the highway,...drive home. Tonight I knew it was time to turn left, it was time to face someone I've hated and resented for at least 40+ years. One of my choices in the UBBT curriculum is to "mend 3 relationships" and for whatever reason I thought of my "Uncle"and could not shake him from my thoughts, no matter how much I tried to justify that he doesn't deserve the time of day from me, I knew it was beyond this and what was important was to clean up my side of the street.
Turning left, took me to the local hospital, the two minute drive seemed surreal, I felt an uneasyness, but also a calming sense of this has to be resolved. Walking into the ward, down the hall and into his room, I took in every step, breath, monitor beep and thought, as I needed to retain and let go of this moment all at the same time; there has always been the underlying thought that I knew we would have to sit in each others presence and make things right, I probably rehearsed tis conversation countless times. I had to keep in mind that I was not to cast blame or justify my past anger at the expense of another, but to make peace with the past itself.
We were able to talk as two men; from the uncle to the nephew, one man to another, one human being to another, one person at the end of his years, another mid life....no malice, just the common threads of compassion and forgiveness throughout the conversation. There were moments where I had to collect my thoughts and ask for a bit of guidance, but I think it was because we were both on unfamiliar ground. In the end, I was able to reach over, give him a hug, tell him how I felt and I do believe it turned out alright, no sooner or later than it was meant to be.
There were a lot of thoughts rolling around in my head after this, most of them now understood and answered with maturity, but still wondering how much time and effort was wasted all those years, when perhaps it could have been different. I do believe there is a lesson to be carried forward from this, time will surely prove it, that's it for today.